In a Nutshell
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When people are angry, their anger often dominates their thoughts. When disappointed, their disappointment --and those who disappointed them -- can dominate their waking moments. Ditto for serious frustration. If this happens at home, walls go up between family members; communication is strained. Family members talk "at" each other, but the occasions they talk "with" each other dwindle. These walls dividing husbands from wives and parents from children spell trouble. With such walls in place, family members may feel hopeless, saying such things as: "He (she) will never care what I think," or "The situation is impossible." It's hard to be happy without hope. |
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When families hurt
By Father Richard Rice, SJCatholic News Service
Consider the following family dilemma: When five siblings split over their folks' inheritance, the family began shaking wildly in the wind. Four blamed the fifth for the split. When that one, the executor, showed the others how he had divided the money, three of them were able to reconcile with him. The other went into a depression, angry at himself for being so harsh with his brother.
The four siblings worked hard not to fall into the fifth one's pit of depression. They held together while caring for their brother. Eventually, with the help of a therapist and medication, and especially with the help of four loving, forgiving siblings, he was able to climb out of the hole.
Inviting a "stranger" into family matters
By Frederic F. Flach, MDCatholic News Service
It disheartens me that many families live in debilitating turmoil and either are not aware of their plight or remain unmotivated to do anything about it. This is disheartening because so much can be done if only family members acknowledge the situation and act.
Families may successfully reach out to close friends, but frequently it is best to turn to a stranger. T.S. Eliot's psychiatrist in his play "The Cocktail Party" remarks to one of his guests-turned-client: "To invite the stranger is to invite the unexpected." It is this "unexpected" that can turn an otherwise deteriorating situation around.
When a family seeks my help
By Father David K. O'Rourke, OPCatholic News Service
Because I was trained and licensed as a counselor many years ago during my early years as a priest, many families have sought my help at times of trouble. In the course of helping folks, I've learned a few lessons.
All families are different. Nonetheless, the lessons I've learned seem to help across the board. I'll mention just four. Two are basic observations, and two are guidelines.
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Faith in the Marketplace | |
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 This Week's Discussion Point: What concrete step(s) did your family -- or a family you know of -- take to "re-create" itself, to become stronger? |
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Selected Response From Readers: |
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