How to monitor technology

By day, Gary Torborg is an instructor at a technology training center in St. Cloud, Minn. By night and weekend, he and his wife, Teresa, members of St. Joseph Parish in Waite Park, Minn., are the parents of four children, ages 3 to 11.

If Torborg had to choose just one word to describe parenting in the '90s, it would be "monitor." Monitor TV. Monitor movies. Monitor music. Monitor the Internet.

Here's how the Torborgs do some of that monitoring:

The children never watch a video unless their parents have previewed it or are watching it with them.
The Torborgs don't necessarily choose movies based on ratings. They have found some "PG" movies unacceptable, and some "R" movies acceptable. It all depends on context and message.
If crude language figures into a movie, they warn their children: "There's going to be language that's not acceptable to use in this house."
Occasionally, they press "pause" and help their children distinguish between what is "real" and what is "fantasy."
The children are not allowed to watch television shows with which their parents are unfamiliar.
They don't assume the total content of so-called children's channels is suitable for their own children.
While the Torborgs don't have Internet access at home, he has advice for parents who do: "Keep up with your kids. Get educated about the Internet. You can't monitor what you don't understand."
Sometimes, the "electronic community" has to be shut down altogether so children can form relationships with relatives, take a walk in nature, learn to make their own music, become acquainted with animals and serve in a soup kitchen.